You may think I am crazy proposing we plan for anything when things such as Covid-19 and unrest have turned our worlds upside down. The reality is that there are many things that we are faced with that cause uncertainty and are out of our control, and as a result we have to develop a level of acceptance in this regard. However, there are things that we can control in our lives, and ways in which we can enhance our sense of purpose and quality of life. When I refer to purpose, I do not mean discovering and pursuing our life’s calling. Purpose can be seeing the smile on our child’s face, feeling the comfort in our partner’s touch, feeling satisfied with a conversation at work, feeling confident in a newly developed skill, and so on.
Having a strategy to achieve our goals can help us commit to, focus on, and actively pursue what we want to change, acquire, or enhance in our lives. There are various strategies that could be employed, most of which involve goal setting. Although the structure of goal setting is not everyone’s style of planning and achieving what we want, evidence has shown its usefulness. In this article I offer one strategy, referred to as the GROW modal, used in executive and life coaching, that could potentially help us work towards our goals. GROW stands for goal, reality, options/obstacles, and will/way forward.
The first step in this strategy is to identify what it is that you would like to change, acquire, or enhance in your life; your goal. Evidence suggests that goals that are SMART (specific, measurable, attainable/achievable, realistic, and time-framed) are more likely to be achieved. Perhaps your goal is to ‘enhance a particular parenting skill’, ‘become a better listener in our relationship’, ‘become more decisive at work’, or ‘lose a few kilograms’. To help identify a goal true to you, ask yourself “What do I want?”, and “What will it look or feel like when I have it?” These are important questions to ask yourself because the goal needs to be true to and for you. It is harder to pursue a goal that someone else believes you need to pursue.
The second step is to evaluate where you are now in relation to the goal you would like to achieve; your current reality. For example, If my goal is to become a better listener in my relationship, what type of listener am I now? What am I noticing, and what feedback am I getting from my partner? If my goal is to become a better leader, what type of leader am I now compared to how I want to be? Knowing where you are now, and where you want to be, can carve the space for the steps you need to take to achieve your goal.
The third step is to identify options as to how you can achieve your goal, as well as obstacles that may get in your way. List all the possible ways or actions you could pursue. Also list all those things that you need to be aware of that may try to sabotage your route. Note which options will be most realistic for you, placing a timeframe on what you plan to pursue.
The fourth step which refers to your will to pursue your goal and paves the way forward. With regards to your ‘will’, ask yourself again if this is a goal that you really want to pursue? What will the positive outcomes be if you achieve this goal? How important is this to you? You also need to create an environment conducive to achieving your goal. Share your goal with a colleague, friend, or family member, and surround yourself with people who support your goal. This helps with accountability.
Lastly, when it comes to goal setting, it is important to prioritise, and choose to pursue only a few goals at a time so that you can focus on achieving them in-between your other responsibilities. Don’t be disheartened if you do not achieve the goal in the timeframe you set, or if you decide it is no longer a goal you wish to pursue. That is a normal part of this process. Goal posts sometimes need to shift because what happens within us and around us is not always in our control. Let changes to your goals be opportunities for reflection and growth.
Wishing you happy goal setting in your personal and professional lives!
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